Monday, January 3, 2011

Facing Frightful Feelings

Youth Options Unlimited (Y.O.U.) was established as a transition school. It wanted to open a site in each of the five boroughs. Its students were preparing to return to neighborhood public schools after residing in state institutions for adolescent offenders.

Many, though not all, of the students were undisciplined, emotionally volatile, and branded as problems when they were removed from their home schools. Through their own errors of judgement, they had lost the opportunity to go to school. The new teachers were scorned by the students. They could not easily establish a setting for open classroom discussions. I came with books of peer writing. The students read Streams aloud. They were interested in Ray Batts’ tale in Bed/Stuy, Brooklyn. Teachers looked on read with their students.

Streams 1

Over the years, the teaching of expressive writing evolved in the YOU program; and Waterways eventually published individual student chapbooks for many of the students. Many students needed one to one assistance to succeed. Otherwise they would have left the social network that was the school. On their own they would choose truancy again. Waterways’ teachers could help the students achieve self expression and self advocacy.

On Staten Island, Barbara went before the local school board to ask that PS 15 be made available to the needs of the Alternative High School superintendency. She was told to forget about it. The building was only used to store custodial supplies. Alice Murray looked at the site for the YOU program and Richard Organisciak looked at the space as a possibility for the Sadie American Program an OES site for pregnant and parenting teens on Staten Island.

Waterways published, Sadie American Sighs. In 1992, the teaching artist we sent to the site was Sonya Ostrom. She was OES’s union rep and board member of the UFT’s English Language Arts Council (ELAC, an Affiliate of the National Council of Teachers of English).

For that issue, Caasi wrote “The Parts of My Life” --

Some parts of my life are so much fun. One of the good things in my life is that I am pregnant, and that I have something to look forward to. This part of my life I love.

But then there is another part of me that is scared and miserable. That part is about boys. Like I have a lot of friends, but that is as far as it goes. The reason for that is because I am afraid that something may happen to him or me. The reason why I feel this way is because of what happened to my boyfriend. And I cannot go through the pain again because I am still dealing with his death.

Another reason is because no one can take the place of the boyfriend I had. He was one of the most caring guys that I knew, and he was always respectful. And we taught each other a lot about many different things. And he loved kids, he was always the cheerful type.

So that is why I don’t want to be with anyone. This is one part of my life that I won’t let anybody into. These are special parts of my life.

Sadie American Sighs (1992)

Another OES classroom on Staten Island was in the Camelot rehab, where we sent Linda Notovitz in 1989. The result was the magazine, Illusions:

The Mountains - Christina M.

Way up in my hidden paradise,
I hear the birds singing
their lovely, spring time song.
The river is slightly swollen
from the melting snow.
Everywhere, everything is in bloom.
The leaves are beginning to sprout.
The new grass shoots are showing
themselves to the world once again.
Bright flowers form a blanket over
the once white and frozen lands.
These are the signs of the coming
of the spring.

In 1990 Margo Mack, who had been teaching on Rikers Island, became a Waterways/OES teaching artist at that site. Her publication included this piece:

My First Day at Camelot by Cede 3

my first day at camelot
it was very confusing to me
worrying about what kind of
people would be there and
how they would treat me
i guess i just came here
with the wrong attitude
because when i needed
someone to talk to
people jump at my feet
this place is like a
second family to me
and i just wish it
would get the respect
it deserves.

Illusions Vol 2 No 3

The city-wide Beacon program provided after school and evening programs for communities in need. United Activities Unlimited (UAU) opened the first site on Staten Island in an elementary school (PS 18) by the West Brighton Projects. Waterways was invited to be a part of that program

Gary Gullo was our teaching artist for the after school program. He was assisted by Thomas Perry and one of our interns from City As School. A small group came together to put our a series of poetry publications with the titles, Compassion in Society and They Don’t Want Us Around: Today’s Crisis. Gary wrote the introduction:

I think the material in this magazine has entered another phase. Students with consistent commitment to the practice and class have gained self-confidence for much of the exercise and technique to fall away and reveal authentic poetry and prose. Discussion has become a regular part of the process and the experience of later century America with all its incomprehensible turnings a likely subject. As one student said, “They’ve only replaced ropes and trees with guns, clubs and wars.”
Is there racism in America? You bet there is.

Compassion In Our Society (Waterways Site Based Publication)

We were welcomed at Alternative Services for High Schools (ASHS) in the St. George School. Shelia Evans-Tranumn was Principal. John Minogue was the acting director. Margaret Friscia was the teacher on site who inspired her students to write.

The Frightful Feeling of Being Neglected in Reality (1990)

The feeling of being neglected is very sad and lonely. When I was a baby, at the age of two months, my mother decided she didn’t want me any more. She sent me away. At the age of four, I recognized the horrible feelings of neglect. Even though I did fully understand the causes and reasons, the lonely feeling was always sitting in the pit of my stomach.

At the age of six, I saw my father whom I had heard a great deal about. I told him I want to see my mamma. But, when he took me to see her, she pointed a knife at me and told me I was eating her children’s food and if I didn’t stop she was going to kill me. I was shaking like a leaf with fright. But, most of all, I was very sad, because my mama didn’t want me. My father brought me back to the place where I used to live. It was terrible. I hated that place because there was no love there.

I lived through my childhood days wondering what have I done to my mother? Why doesn’t she want me? Oh, how I wished I could change her mind so some day she would come and get me. But, she never did . Now I am twenty eight years old and still wishing she would change; hoping for the day when she will tell me she loves me. But, she never does.

Anyway, on the twenty sixth of December, 1991, I confronted her about the way she treated me. She just tried to blame it on my father, saying he never used to give her any support. In my heart, I know that’s not the truth. I told her. But, she denied it; as she always did. But, oh, how I wish and long for a mother’s love. (by Joy T.)

Reality

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