from Raymond's poem, Gay Rights,
One Saturday in 1984 Rochelle Wall, a member of the West Village Committee and Community Board 2, found Barbara and me at our usual post managing the Committee’s used bookstore beside the White Horse Tavern on West 11th Street. Rochelle had learned from Steve Ashkinazy, who was also a member of Community Board 2, of the plight of troubled gay youth and Steve’s desire to open a school for them. Barbara, an officer of the West Village Committee, had served as parent advocate on Community School District 2's Committee On the Handicapped. Rochelle asked her to help gain education services for the youth, many with emotional and physical disabilities, who were truant and hanging out on the West Village piers.
After consulting with Marcia Shelton and Steve Phillips at the Office of Alternative High Schools and programs, Barbara connected Steve Ashkinazi and Wayne Steinman (representing two interested agencies) with Offsite Educational Services. This was also the beginning of Ten Penny Players involvement with the Office of Alternative High Schools and Programs.
The controversies that accompanied the opening of the school were exacerbated by the local press. Headlines in the News and features on TV brought more reporters, who gathered outside the original church site. For the students who sought asylum from the negative attention they were getting from their family and friends, the hostile attention from the media contributed to a feeling that their classroom was under siege.
The Harvey Milk site was a refuge from an angry world, but the gay youth were segregated. Could the schools learn to protect the vulnerable? The alternative superintendency took on the challenge. Fred Goldhaber became the public school teacher at the Harvey Milk program, and I was asked to visit the site once a week as resource room teacher working with students who were certified for special education intervention.
As with the other agencies and parents the school’s concern for the mental health of the students sometimes came in conflict with the agency. Joyce Hunter, a social worker, expressed her concern when I let the school know of a student’s mental health issues. The agency wanted to take care of its own clients without the Board of Education questioning their ability to provide services.
The site based Waterways publication came out in November ’86. It was called Lifestyles. Five students offered contributions of essays, poetry, reviews and fiction in English and Spanish. Betsy wrote an essay, Report on Homophobia in Parents, which concluded:
This is why parents treat us the way they do. This is why parents talk about gays in a negative way... hardly ever in a positive way. Parents often believe in the sex roles, but sex roles do not determine a child’s sexual orientation. The most masculine men just might be gay. The girl that plays the role of one who could steal any man’s heart just might be gay/lesbian. The normal well-intentioned parent has these fears about raising their kids free: that sex roles determine sexuality; that specific ingredients make a child homosexual; and that homosexuality is one of the worst things that can happen. Some of the things that parents look for that tell that their child will come out queer are: a girl doesn’t date boys and does not want to associate with them; a boy doesn’t show that he likes a girl; a boy is a mama’s boy then he can’t be a woman’s man. Believe it or not parents do look for these things, and if they find them then they try to change their child’s behavior as soon as possible.
Knowing this won’t change your parents’ ways or their thinking, but will help you understand your parents a little better. Maybe with a little time and understanding your parents will learn to accept you. Just try to be yourself. It might help a little. Or a simple, I love you, might do the trick.
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